Community Expectations

Our purpose

The Center for Trans Futures exists to support trans, nonbinary, and gender expansive adults through community, learning, mutual aid, and care. We build spaces where people can show up whole, without having to perform, explain, or prove themselves.

Who this space is for

This is a trans-led, trans-centered space. Some programs may welcome close loved ones or allied professionals when explicitly stated; however, if an event is trans only, we mean it.

Our core values

  1. We treat each other like people, not projects to be fixed.

  2. We ask, we listen, we respect the answer.

  3. We believe in accountability and repairing harm when it happens.

  4. We protect privacy and each other from unwanted exposure.

  5. We make room for different bodies, brains, incomes, and needs.

  6. We take each other seriously, and we do not abandon each other.

Guidelines for being in community

1. Respect names, pronouns, and self-definition

  • Use the names and pronouns people give you.

  • Do not debate identity, labels, or someone’s body.

  • If you mess up, correct yourself briefly and move on. Do not make it about your guilt.

2. Consent is an everyday practice

Consent applies to conversation, touch, photos, personal questions, advice, and how we share information.

  • Ask before touching anyone, including hugs.

  • Ask before giving advice. Try “Do you want support, ideas, or a witness?”

  • Ask before discussing sensitive topics, including trauma, sex, kink, addiction, self-harm, and medical transition.

  • Accept “no,” “not now,” and “I do not want to answer” without pushback.

3. Privacy and confidentiality

We protect each other’s safety and autonomy.

  • Do not share someone’s trans status, history, legal or deadname, workplace, housing situation, medical information, or relationship structure without explicit permission.

  • Do not take photos or record audio or video unless the event explicitly allows it.

  • If photos are allowed, always get consent before photographing someone, and again before posting.

  • What is shared here stays here, unless someone asks you to help them share it.

4. This is a sober and safer space

For most Center spaces, we aim for sober, grounded connection.

  • Do not bring alcohol or drugs to Center spaces.

  • Do not attend while intoxicated.

  • Prescription medication used as prescribed is always welcome.

  • If you are struggling, you are not in trouble. We will prioritize safety, support, and boundaries.

5. No harassment, discrimination, or targeting

We do not allow:

  • Misgendering, deadnaming, racism, antisemitism, Islamophobia, xenophobia, ableism, fatphobia, whorephobia, classism, ageism, or hatred of any kind.

  • Sexual harassment, unwanted flirting, coercion, stalking, threats, or intimidation.

  • Bullying, dogpiling, public shaming campaigns, or “call out” performances that put someone at risk.

  • Mocking someone’s communication style, disability, education level, housing status, or survival strategies.

The Center for Trans Futures is explicitly opposed to truscum (transmedicalist) ideology in all forms.

This includes any belief or behavior that:

  • Treats dysphoria as a requirement for being trans.

  • Frames medical transition, surgery, hormones, or diagnosis as proof of being legitimately trans.

  • Police who is considered “really” trans, nonbinary, gender expansive, or “trans enough.”

  • Pressures people toward or away from transition pathways.

  • Devalues nonbinary identities, fluidity, or people who do not want medical intervention.

  • Uses respectability politics to rank trans people by how well they conform to binary norms.

In this community:

  • Self-identification is enough.

  • There is no hierarchy of transness.

  • People’s bodies, histories, and choices are not up for debate.

  • We do not allow “debate” framed as education that ends up interrogating someone’s identity, access to care, or legitimacy.

If you are still unlearning transmedicalism, you are welcome to learn with us.

How this will be enforced

  • If someone brings truscum or transmedicalist policing into the space, facilitators may interrupt in the moment to protect participants.

  • We may ask the person to pause, reflect, and stop the behavior immediately.

  • Repeated policing, baiting, or refusal to stop will lead to removal from the space.

6. Conflict, feedback, and repair

Conflict happens, but what matters most is how we handle it.

  • Start with direct, respectful communication when it is safe to do so.

  • Use “impact” language rather than assumptions about intent.

  • If you harmed someone, listen, acknowledge, and take steps to repair.

  • If you need support, ask a facilitator; you do not have to carry it alone.

  • We do not force reconciliation and understand that repair does not require closeness.

7. Kink-aware, trauma-aware, and polyamory aware culture

We will not shame people for consensual adult sexuality, relationship structure, or identity. We also keep community spaces appropriate to the context.

  • Do not involve others in sexual content without consent.

  • Do not discuss explicit sexual details in general spaces. Keep it PG-13 unless the space is clearly labeled for adult discussion.

  • No cruising, propositions, or sexual pressure in Center spaces.

  • Relationship respect includes metamours, exes, and chosen family. We practice discretion and do not triangulate.

8. Community care and mutual aid boundaries

We support each other without turning the Center into a crisis hotline or a single person’s support system.

  • Ask for help with clarity and offer help within your limits.

  • Do not pressure people to disclose trauma.

  • Facilitators can help connect you to resources, but they are not emergency responders.

  • If someone is in immediate danger, call local emergency services. If calling the police would increase danger, ask a facilitator for alternative crisis options when available.

    • Richmond Behavioral Health Authority – 804-819-4100
    • Emergency services – 911
    • Suicide and Self-harm Crisis – 988
    • Non-emergency, local community resource for food, housing, and utility assistance – 211

9. Accessibility and inclusion

Access is part of respect and inclusive community building.

  • We avoid assumptions about capacity, money, transportation, or comfort with crowds.

  • We respect scent sensitivity. Avoid heavy fragrances when possible.

  • We keep paths clear for mobility aids.

  • We use microphones when available.

  • If you need an accommodation, please always ask. We will do our best to meet your need and be honest about our own limits.

10. Participation and shared space norms

  • Share time by stepping up and stepping back.

  • Avoid interrupting and let people finish their thoughts.

  • Do not dominate conversations with extended monologues, unsolicited lectures, or hot takes.

  • Speak from your own experience and try not to generalize for all trans people.

  • Do not bring online drama into the space.

11. Money, sliding scale, and resource respect

  • Pay what you can when there is a sliding scale. If you cannot pay, you are still welcome when the event allows it.

  • Do not police who “deserves” aid.

  • If you receive mutual aid, do not post about it publicly without Center permission. Protect everyone involved.

Other community guidelines

  • For online interactions: no doxxing, no screenshots shared outside the group, no forwarding messages without consent.

  • Do not use the community as a place to recruit for sales, research, or political organizations without explicit permission.

Reporting concerns

We take concerns seriously, including small ones that could become big ones.
You can report:

  • Harassment or discrimination.

  • Boundary violations.

  • Safety concerns.

  • Conflicts you cannot resolve alone.

  • Facilitator conduct concerns.

Reporting options:

  1. Talk to a facilitator at the event.

  2. Use the private reporting form.

  3. Ask for a confidential check-in.

What to expect after a report:

  • We will listen and ask what you need.

  • We will prioritize immediate safety.

  • We will document the report internally.

  • We may set boundaries, issue warnings, require agreements, remove someone from an event, or suspend participation.

  • We will share outcomes only to the extent we can without violating privacy.

Accountability and consequences

Consequences are chosen based on harm, pattern, and safety.
Possible actions include:

  • A conversation and a clear boundary.

  • A written agreement for future participation.

  • Temporary suspension.

  • Permanent removal from Center spaces.

Some behaviors may lead to immediate removal:

  • Threats or violence.

  • Sexual coercion or stalking.

  • Intoxication that disrupts safety.

  • Targeted harassment or discrimination.

  • Repeated boundary violations after warning.